is ur name wifi because i’m feeling the connection
shoutout to my parents for not supervising what i do on the internet ever
hello 911 yes i’d like to report a murder
this bitch killed my vibe
what type of rock is a really good friend
rocks will be your only friends if you ever use this joke
MY MATH TEACHER SAW ME TEXTING AND MADE ME STAND IN FRONT OF THE ROOM AND HE TOLD ME TO READ THE TEXTS BUT I WOULNT SO HE TOOK MY PHONE AND READ THE LAST THREE ON THERE OUT LOUD AND THE FIRST ONE WAS “IM HUNGRY” AND MY FRIEND REPLIED WITH “HUNGRY FOR SEMEN” AND I SAID “TRUE THOUGH” IMGONNA JUMP OFF A BUILDING
How the FUCK am I supposed to have a good day when 28% of Americans aren’t getting enough fiber?
i fucking hate you kathy lee
Google is definitely a woman, it starts suggesting things before you can even finish your sentence.
That must mean Bing is a man, tries to convince people it’s superior and does a horrible job with pleasing its user.
Sometimes, the adolescent elephant will throw itself upon the ground as a sign of extreme emotional distress, commonly known as a “tantrum.”
i am an adolescent elephant
how to give an awful handjob
- be unaware of where the penis is
- scream into the penis
- use the back of your hand
- slap the penis and call it “buddy”
- condescend to the penis
- set your hand on fire